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HEL SCANS
[Translator – Angel Dust]
[Proofreader – Prototype]
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Chapter 145
It’s unbelievable how enjoyable the start of a new semester can be. I love the academy. Oh-ho-ho! I love the start of a new semester!
Ah, to be more precise, it’s not the start of the semester itself that’s enjoyable, but rather what I get to see because of it.
“Kaaarl!―”
“Karl, you bastard!”
“Karl!!”
“Karl Adelheit!!”
Hmm. The screams of the quartet really create a perfect harmony. Oh my, I really love it.
I’ve always wished for the day they’d scream because of me, and here I am, getting my revenge.
Hahaha! Now you will understand how I feel! This is what it means to taste your own medicine, reincarnated style! You guys can go crazy because of me for once!
“Karl! What the hell did you do!”
“Why did the Office of Sainthood Causes from the Holy See suddenly contact us? Explain!”
“Patron saint? Patron saaaiint? You asked them to include us in that portrait?!”
“Why?! I didn’t do anything, why the hell!”
You’re asking the obvious. You guys. Still don’t know your sins?
“Oh, woe is me. Your foolishness knows no bounds.”
“Did you have a drink during the day?”
“This is merely to absolve you of your original sin of spreading that evil mint chocolate.”
“What nonsense!”
“Oh-ho. Nonsense, you say? Would you dare speak that way to this blessed individual who has received a miracle from the Goddess? To the man who will one day be canonized?! Wilhelm! Are you a heretic by any chance?”
I can almost picture the scene where the armed priest squad appears from behind, shouting ‘Amen!’
Just as well, I wield a greatsword similar to a bayonet, don’t I? Would you like to fall like straw? Ahh?!
Fortunately, the church isn’t that extreme.
“No, just tell us why. Why on earth are we getting the patron saint positions all of a sudden.”
“So what? Even a guy like me will return to the side of light and become a saint, so it’s only natural that you who hang out with me get at least that much status.”
“Still, I don’t want to be eternally enshrined next to your portrait!”
“We’re friends, aren’t we? Friends go to hell together.”
“If we’re friends, shouldn’t you stop us from going to hell with you?!”
Sigh. These faithless friends of mine. I did this all for you!
They may say otherwise, but they surely understand, don’t they? They know exactly what it means for me to name them as my patron saints and the impact it will have on them.
Just so you know, being named a patron saint isn’t something that’s given to just anyone.
Only those who are deemed worthy to be alongside canonized saints receive this honor. These are the people who, during the saint’s lifetime, closely supported them and had their own influence.
If a saint is said to have received a miracle from Goddess, then a patron saint can be seen as a supporter or friend who helped the saint up until the moment the miracle was received.
“You guys act like you don’t get it, but I know your minds are racing.”
“What are you talking about―”
“Becoming a patron saint? Having your portraits included in a holy painting that will hang in the Holy See forever? Do you really not understand what this means? Can’t you imagine the influence it will have?”
Compared to me, those four are far more aristocratic. Unlike me, who recently became a minor lord and heir, those guys were born heirs.
So, they probably made political calculations the moment they heard about becoming patron saints.
“If you really don’t want to do it, just tell me. I’ll call it off.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, really. But instead of just calling it off, I’ll say, ‘Oh, it turns out this friend has such-and-such flaws and is therefore disqualified from being a patron saint.’ So just keep that in mind.”
“How is that calling it off! You’re just forcing us to do it!”
Oh-ho. Shulifen. As expected from the first Hydra, you’re quick-witted. Yes, that’s right! That’s the correct answer!
I’m setting these unreasonable conditions precisely because I’m determined to make you do it! Keh-heh-heh!
Despite their reactions, they’re probably being told by their family heads or other family members that ‘This is a tremendous honor!’
They were personally invited to the canonization ceremony in the Holy See. That alone is proof that they have performed deeds recognized by the church.
In the noble world, having a close relationship with the Radiant Church, which has continental influence, is considered almost as significant and honorable as having ties with the imperial family.
But here, it’s not just a simple friendly relationship. Becoming the patron saints of someone who will someday join the ranks of the saints?
And it’s not even the Holy See that selected them, but rather the pre-saint who received a miracle from Goddess who said, ‘Ah, these guys are more than worthy to be my patron saints, so please place them by my side’?
In the same imperial county and marquisate, those four hold exceptionally prominent positions. In terms of social prestige, they might even rival the ducal families.
Even among the ducal families, who are political partners of the imperial family, there has never been a saint, blessed, or even a patron saint.
The higher one is in the political hierarchy, the less likely they are to be closely involved with the church.
So, them becoming patron saints is not a loss in any way.
“In short, you all should be grateful to me.”
“No way…”
“Damn it. He’s right, so I can’t even argue.”
Alexander and Joachim are clutching their heads and groaning.
Meanwhile, Shulifen folds his arms and starts pondering deeply.
What now? Whenever he comes up with something, it always ends badly.
“Wait a minute, Karl. Is the empire just going to let this slide?”
“…Huh?”
“You’re not being canonized right now, but it’s a guaranteed future canonization. So eventually, Karl, you will be a saint. Oh, and by saint, I don’t mean the secular kind—”
“I know that, you idiot, Shulifen.”
“Just making sure. Wilhelm, anyway.”
“…”
Look at them bickering again in that short moment. Honestly, Shulifen and Wilhelm should be thankful they’re both men.
If they were both women, they’d probably fight until they died, and if one of them was a different gender, they’d fight, fall in love, get married, and still fight until they died.
“Anyway. He’s asking if the empire will just let a future saint pass by quietly.”
Wait. So Shulifen is suggesting… we should all get caught in the blast together?
“Be reasonable. I’ve never heard of giving medals in such cases.”
“Are you sure, Karl?”
“Of course… probably?”
Damn it, really? Medals, again? No way! They wouldn’t give out medals for something like this!
On the surface, I denied it. But I couldn’t help but feel uneasy. If this is the case, wouldn’t it be better to get a definitive answer for some peace of mind?
* * *
“…And that’s why you came to me?”
Lately, I’ve been meeting my brother-in-law more often. And almost every time, it’s because my brother-in-law is just too outstanding.
But today is different. He suddenly asked for a meeting, and out of the blue, he said, ‘Your Highness, am I getting another medal?’
“This is a big deal to me.”
“…I’m sure it is.”
My brother-in-law calls them ‘heavy iron trinkets.’ Some people would do anything to receive one of those trinkets.
It’s not just a trinket, though. It’s proof of hard work and honor.
Of course, he doesn’t mean to dismiss them. It’s just that he believes his actions are ‘simply the right thing to do,’ not something that needs a medal.
“To get to the point, no, you won’t be getting a medal.”
“Ah!”
“What’s with the ‘Ah!’? Brother-in-law.”
I shouldn’t find this so funny. I seriously wonder sometimes if he’s really Rika’s brother. They’re like night and day.
“Don’t tell me you’re glad you’re not getting one? That’s absurd. It’s not that you’re NOT getting a medal, it’s that they CAN’T give you one.”
“Huh?”
Has anyone ever found a lost sacred relic? Or received a miracle in the Holy See? Never. It’s simply unheard of.
Even if it did happen, would a ‘medal’ be enough? War is one thing, but finding a sacred relic or receiving a miracle is on a whole other level.
“You shouldn’t be happy about not getting a medal. Immense glory and honor are heading your way, and they’ll make any medal look like a cheap toy.”
“….”
“It seems that with all the recent fuss about medals, I’ve lost sight of the bigger picture.”
After hearing me out, my brother-in-law kept muttering, ‘I see, I see,’ and then started spouting strange noises like ‘Aoh! Aoh-ooh!’
“Ah, and while I have you here at the Imperial Palace, I should probably mention this in advance.”
“Please, Your Highness. I beg you, tell me it’s not another huge ordeal.”
I’m sorry, brother-in-law, but it is.
“His Majesty will be summoning you soon. And no complaining, you hear? Think about everything you’ve done recently. The Emperor can’t just stay silent when a noble of his own country receives a miracle, can he?”
Karl might think he’s the only one struggling, but if he had any conscience, he’d consider those around him.
In fact, both His Majesty and I have been caught in the crossfire. A noble family loyal to the Imperial Family suddenly produces a benefactor of the Church? And then suddenly becomes a saintly figure?
We thought that was the end of it, but now he’s received a miracle and is being considered for canonization?
‘Karl, you have no idea how much our workload has increased because of you.’
So, whether it’s a medal or something else, just accept it graciously. Didn’t I tell you before? If we don’t look after you, the Imperial Family will be criticized for years to come.
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HEL SCANS
[Translator – Angel Dust]
[Proofreader – Prototype]
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